This isn't a specific memory. When I was growing up I knew I had the best parents in the world. I felt sorry for other people for not having my parents - especially my dad. Even my cousins I felt sorry for because they didn't luck out and get the better sibling. Then I got older and thought other people thought that way about their parents. I was really astonished to find out that very few do. I know of no one that felt their parents were superior to anyone else's at any point in their lives. It wasn't something my parents told me. It wasn't something my parent even instilled in me - this was an observation I came to all on my own. So finally when I was a young mother I realized for me I did have the best parents in the world - for me. There wasn't anything cocky about it but just a plain fact. I have always been grateful that I have had the parents that I have had. There were times I have had a hard time with my mother but then when I was able to start to read the symptoms of her illness I would realize that when she became snippy she was coming out of remission and we were in for a battle again. Unfortunately it took me a long time to read that sign and there were many years of hurt feelings because of that. I know now that if she had some control over it those words would have never happened. After Mom's death I found out my dad and I tried to protect each other. We would see the flare-ups start and so we would try and sheild each other so the other wouldn't be hurt. I love Dad more for protecting me.
I know that I was not nearly as good a mother to our daughters' as my mother was to my siblings and me. I am hoping that I can measure up and be as good a grandmother as my Omi Tuttle was to me and my mother was to our daughters' on her healthy days. If I can do half as well then I will know I am a success in this life. My whole life I have wanted to be 3 things, a wife, mother and a grandmother. I have accomplished these goals - the last one with the help of our daughters' and their husbands! I am lucky that in these life desires I can keep growing - they are not the end-all of all desires once they are attained.
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2 comments:
You are and always have been an amazing mom, and our children are blessed to call you Grandma! I love you!
We mailed a letter today and Anneke said "That's for Grandma." i told her it wasn't and she was said. Unless you want our bills we will send you a real letter another day.
My children love you as their grandma and I wouldn't have it any other way.
I felt lucky to have you as a mom. You would go on school trips with us and stay up after we were out so we had someone to talk to. I think that we each have a special relationship with you because of your efforts.
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